the recent relative silence

Been busy

Been tired

been dreading Pittsburg, though mainly because I hate PA with a terrible passion. And because I know what will happen. Sigh. I'm tired. Tired of people who have had a good working relationship with us for years suddenly buying into the lies and bullying that are going around without once giving us the benefit of the doubt, without once asking. Because we're classy enough not to name names and make our own accusations. Because we simply refuse to sink to their level and call them out.

You can be sure there are a few people I can't wait to see at RT, just to kick them in the teeth and tell them to kiss my ass. The other people, well, I'm looking forward to seeing them.

This is why I haven't posted a lot. It's hard to find something positive to say. I really just want the whole con season to be over. I want to have people they tell me they love me without having to ask for it. I want more cowboys and less bullshit. I am not in the bullshit business, as someone's daddy says.

I'm just tired.

:p

cowboys and bullfighters and pick up men oh my

God, I needed Albuquerque.

In fact, I'm a little grumpy that I had to come home.

I know that's horrible. but I'm at the point of vapor lock, you know?


At any rate, there was Chris Shivers on the plane, and Chris Shivers riding 3 bulls, 2 for 90+ point rides. There was some completely appropriate Chris touching with other cowboys that made me think inappropriate thoughts. I actually blushed once. Damn.

There was Adriano, who walked right by me with a big old smile on his face

Wylie Peterson was back, and looking healthy, and while I don't find him hot, I adore his sense of humor and miss his face when he's not around

Shorty Gorham broke a bone in his back after he got slammed the first night, and we all need to think good thoughts for him. It's only supposed keep him out 4 weeks, but it's never good.

We got to meet Frank Newsome's wife in Old Town, and she's a lovely woman with a down home voice that we just instinctively understood.

There was corny dogs and green chile stuffed sopapillas and banana splits.

There were good rides, a couple of bad spills, and lots of chatting with other fans.

All in all, I had a blast with S, and didn't get near enough work done. But it was worth it!

Oh, and did I squee when Chris got on the plane? Yes. Yes I did

a dose of the good

we needed a dose of the good here at Chez TQ, so we made a traditional English roast supper for Easter. We did the Gordon Ramsay last supper version of roast and gravy and Yorkshire puddings, along with roasted potatoes like we had in a pub in London. Crispy outside, soft and fluffy on the inside.

The Yorkshire puddings came out! They needed to be done for maybe 2 more minutes, but we did it!

The potatoes were amazing. The roast was nummy. And we tried a new coconut cake that was very nice. Fluffy and light, though I think if we make it again, we'll do it in 2 pans and put whipped cream and coconut in between the layers. That will keep the coconut from drying out, instead of putting it on top.

Yeah, it was a good easter supper.

the last few days

Lord, lord, folks. What can I say?

How about migraine yesterday that means I lost my third straight day of work to something that doesn't deserve my time.

How about since I had to take so much med for the migraine, my kidneys are now rioting

I feel let down, some by myself and things that I let slip through the cracks, but also by others. I don't air my dirty laundry in public, but there are things I won't be able to get over. There are people in my life who I thought ought to know better, who have done irreparable harm, and I wish I could say I was a big enough person to get over it, but I'm not.

Not when my sugars are sitting at HI on my meter and my meter cuts off at 800. Not when I've seen the stuff I've seen. Not when I sat and cried on it all night a few nights ago and couldn't come up with a reason to keep trying.

All I can say is that's it's time to put on my big girl panties and suck it up, so I can get back to work and maybe go watch some bullriding.

y'all be good to yourselves and have a good weekend

so I lied

I went and bought a pack. It was just a case of one thing too many

some days you just want to hide in bed

then again, the day I let someone else tell me how to run my business is the day I start closing it down, so fuck 'em

What, I don't have to be professional here

If I didn't have a cigarette today, I'm good to go for a bit

The problem is that I really don't want to quit. I have to for my health. I have no doubt I will have to have a smoke at RT, because otherwise I will quite literally do something awful. Of course, if things continue on apace I won't have to, as the lawyer will be doing it for me. Speculation is one thing. Libel and slander are another.

I'll just get S to buy menthols. I don't like them enough to smoke more than a few

so, I figured it out

Food critic and super duper asshole at large, Alan Richman has summed up what it is about Yankees that makes me crazy and somewhat violent in his bile filled article about New Orleans:

"New Orleans has always been about food and music, with parades added to the mix. (In the North, where I come from, we like to think we’re about jobs and education, with sports thrown in.) Vulnerability goes along with loving the dinner table too much—think again of our old friends the French. It might sound harmless for a civilization to focus on food, but it’s enormously indulgent. Name a society that cherishes tasting menus and I’ll show you a people too portly to mount up and repel invaders."

(you can find the most amazingly insensitive article here: http://men.style.com/gq/features/full?id=content_5165 )

This is it, exactly. That sense of superiority. That fucking Puritan sense of entitlement. The idea that if you love life and love food and enjoy being who you are, you're stupid, ignorant, and less worthy.

Fuck that shit, and fuck him. How's that for succinct and articulate?